Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Have Herpes or HPV? Need a hookup site?

So poz personals and hookup/dating sites for HIV positive folks have been around for a while. I wondered what dating services were out there for folks with other viral stds like herpes and HPV. Answer: Quite a few. Disclaimer: the following 4 sites have a straight focus.

STDmatch - This site appears to be world wide. Looks an smells like any other hookup/dating site, except for the required step of disclosing your particular STD, and then the STD you prefer your potential partner(s) to have. The home page defines it audience as folks with HSV, HPV or HIV. One thing I noticed was that chlamydia was listed as the lone bacterial know there's a treatment for that? Other than the overactive advertisments, this looks like a great site.

STDsingles - "It's fun, interactive, safe and anonymous -- until you decide to take it further." Hmmm...I think they mean it isn't anonymous anymore after you meet someone. I didn't get that at first. I was thinking, hmmm...good way to sabotage your hookup site. The registration process for this site is a bit irritating with lots of blinking arrows. All fields are required. They also call your STD your "condition."

Positivesingles - Positive singles is free or ~$20/mo for "Gold Membership," which actually seems necessary to really connect with anyone. This site has a great collection of "STD blogs" written by members. I found some heated debates about whether men or women suffer more from STDs (I think we know the answer to that / CDC is trying to prioritize correctly). Most resource links take you to commercial sites, but my favorite links was CharlotteH, a club in NC for folks with either herpes type or HPV.

STDFriends - Because of the funky pile of search terms at the bottom of the page, the seemingly bogus testimonials, and the low membersip numbers, this site seems a little hungry. However...I really like it. Unlike the others, you can select "Dating" or "Intimage Encounters." No where else have I seen casual encounter ads for STD positive folks. Most sites are geared towards partnership/marriage, as if to say, 'since you have an STD, don't be slut.' The other great feature (besides being free) is the drop down menus, including "what really turns me on." It's got some great choices, including: "a beard," "incense," "hard rock music," etc. Oh, and there's a page about telling your partner about your STD. This site has my top vote.

Coming soon, reviews of:,,,, and .


Anonymous said...

This is the weirdest blog I've come across in a while...I like it a lot.

Will be back...


Alicia said...

I think it is great that these sites exist, however, I didn't realize that a hookup site was needed for people with HPV. Since most people have this viral infection, is it really necessary to disclose? (Most people don't have the strain that causes symptoms such as cervical cancer or genital warts).

Phalligator said...

Yeah, I guess when I was looking at these, I was tending to imagine that the sites would be the most useful for people with warts, or recurring warts. But yeah...most people don't get tested for HPV, especially men...or don't know they had it. Or they clear the infection before it can even be a problem.

Alicia said...

You are probably right...Actually a friend of mine in college had precancerous cells from HPV that had to be frozen off...her doctor told her that she did not have to disclose to future partners. I thought that was kind of strange but I guess the logic was that most people even with the more dangerous strains don't actually develop disease.

This site though would certainly make it less awkward if you have warts :)

Anonymous said...

"I found some heated debates about whether men or women suffer more from STDs (I think we know the answer to that)."

Nope. Not all of us know the answer to that.

Phalligator said...

You're totally right Anonymous. I shouldn't assume.

Women have much higher morbidity from STDs, and more serious long term complicatioins like PID (pelvic inflammatory disease), cervical cancer or infertility.

DaveyBoy said...

I made a free HIV/AIDS dating site on, it has over 15,000 POZ members now. I made it as I was a single HIV positive male. Site is still free even though I have met my match.

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised you havent reviewed Antopia ( as a Herpes dating site. They say they are the biggest.

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised you havent reviewed Antopia ( as they say they are the biggest.

HIVtest said...

Meet other POZ on :)

Anonymous said...

There is a brand new site that has gained 450 members in less than 4 days since opening. Membership is very active and it's a fun community! Check out! It's definitely the best around...

Anonymous said...

hi folks, generally speaking, the h bomb dating sites are more geared towards herpes
than hpv, and the category always suffers because of poor numbers. Hence and thus,
i took the initiative to start a google group.

as of this writing i am the only member. this group will be for new york city, (New York N.Y.) and the surrounding areas of New Jersey and Connecticut, for persons with hpv only, no (hsv+hpv) double d's, please, there's plenty of that on the h bomb sites.

the brief mission statement on the web page says:
this group is for heterosexual singles with hpv who would like to chat with, meet, date, or develop an ltr

the site url is:

the welcoming post states:

"different people will choose many different types of relationships that are suitable for them, but not for others. be respectful of the style of relationship a person is interested in. for some an ltr is too narrow, and for others, just dating is just not enough. all mindsets are created equal here."

nuff said there. it's easy to join. you can post publicly, respond publicly, or respond privately to a poster. the public page will be managed lightly, but not moderated. i am not setting any guidelines that reflect my narcissism, beliefs, or philosophies, nor those of any particular ethnic or religous group or regional sensibility.

the open minded description of the group as stated above will remain unchanged unless there is
a very good reason to do so.

thank you for your interest. please refer anyone (w/hpv in nyc/tristate area) who is appropriate for the group. i encourage others to set up similar groups in other cities.

Qwerty Keys---

Sharon said...


1 in 4 sexually active teenagers become infected with an STD every year, in the United States alone. Now, more than ever, we need to join together to fight this growing issue. As I read through your website, it is clear that you share the same passion for STD/STI awareness. We here, at, understand the importance of STD/STI prevention and treatments. If you could, please list us as a resource or host our social book mark button, it would be much appreciated. We can not reach every teenager, but together we can try.
If you need more information please email me with the sublect line as your URL.

Thank you,
Sharon Vegoe