Manhunt places official badges on health profiles

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Massmen vlogger shows some skin

Daniel, a Massmen blogger known for his chronicle of non-monogamy struggles and recovery from long distance hell, is taking a step by using video blogging for the first time. Meet Victor and hear a little about their trip to Montreal in this first episode:


Nico the Great, another blogger of ours, recently sero-converted. Lately he has been challenged by people with age assumptions and has been frustrated with guys' takes on online status disclosure.
Read: Age is deceiving? and Newbie HIV+ vs. Seasoned HIV+.

Dotmen.net - man hunting tools of the future

The STOP AIDS Project, a San Francisco fixture since 1985, is dedicated to preventing HIV transmission among gay and bisexual men. Yesterday marked the launch of their new website Dotmen.net.

Feeding off their recent realignment towards a more structural approach, Dotmen.net provides tools for finessing your online hunt, tips for staying safe when hooking up (including from identity theft and muggings), and commentary about trends and language in the hookup world.

Hookinguponline.org, an older ISIS project, is decidedly less gadget based, and offers hookup safety gems in brief a slide show. The site was an adaptation from image-based print materials, which speaks to the image based presentation.

Regardless of approach, both sites aim to help folks who hookup online make better choices. For the more tech savvy crowd, increased search capability could help you find the sharpest needle in the haystack. For the cruisers without a minute to spare, Hookinguponline.org has all the tidbits you need to keep you on your toes.

Hooking up online - some quirky truth(s)

I've been following two (one queer and one gay) Massachusetts bloggers, both ultra candid about their experiences with online dating and sex. Their blogs are embedded in the Massmen.net site, a UCSF and ISIS joint project.

So now, let me share my favorite entries from these two spill-it-alls:






Priests, bathrooms, etc. Vlad Junior is a good read all around.

Holy Porn - Gay.com Priest hookup
Bathroom break
Bathroom break 2
My hookup and my dad - a real tear jerker
Uncle, Nephew, different times - need i say more







Oh Daniel. Daniel and his boyfriend have been trying out and open relationship.

Relationshit! The Victor and Daniel intro
Suck my dick in a bathroom
Relationsigns (cartoons!)
Polyamory here I come Victor and Daniel update
Webcam boy Part 1

Kink.com sponsors ASACP

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

How slick is your sex ? - anal sex quiz from Lifelube

LifeLube, a site packed with online resources for gay/bi/queer men, has a lube quiz aimed at helping researchers decide which lubes to prioritize for safety testing. If you are a lover of anal sex, take this quiz and help them out.

We like this site for many reasons, one being they are helping us share InSPOT with the world AND they have a great blog with recent posts about queerness in Saudi Arabia, circumcision news and serosorting debates.

Screw with M4M-world, or else!

So I have a membership to M4M-World , a gay men's hookup/sex site. Yesterday I get this message from Steven Alexander, the director, and it totally creeped me out. I totally agree that adding extra insurances into your hookup site is a great idea, and whatever they come up with to verify some strand of legitimacy to their members I'm all for...I'm just surprised he's marketing the feature in this way. Is the possibility of turning into a bloody pulp going to make you want to go get it on with strangers? See below (complete with spelling errors):

"It is one of my worst nightmares. I have dreamt about it maybe a dozen times since I founded this dating site back in 1997. It always the same...I am sleeping. It is hot--mid summer...suddenly there is a loud knock at the front door. My dogs start barking and I look out the second story window from above down to the front portico below. There are two cops holding up a body of a man, slumped at the knees. I wonder "Is he a drunk? Do I know him? Is he a tresspasser?" I rush down the stairs through the center hall, to the front foyer and than through the wrought iron and glass French front door I now see a man badly beaten, barely breathing, dripping blood from his head. I am puzzled and horrified at once. And one of the cops starts screaming at me -- "Open up and tell us his name" "you are you responsible for this" "where does he live, we must tell his mother". I plead "but I don't know him I have never..." and I stop mid-sentence because the man's lips beging to move and he whispers "I just wanted to be with someone for a while, I really didn't do anything, why do they hate me?" I start crying. The man stops talking....stops breathing. I wake up.

Meeting men on line can be a lot a fun, it can be done quickly, but it has risks beyond those that come when you pick someone up in a club or bar. There are no witnesses and you don't always have the opportunity to meet in a public place. And I realize it can be a turn off to give the guy the 4th degree . A legit guy begins to wonder why are you so suspicious? Or he might be very smooth and talk you out of your fears. That's what happened in the sad tale of Michael J. Sandy when using a dating site (not m4m--Google his name in quotes to read his fate).

So listen...it's not just those awful dreams...I really care and worry that the men on m4m date safely. And that's why we developed member feedback currently beta marketed as the Player's Club. (There is a contest to find a new name....you have had email's on that). We created member feedback not as a popularity contest and not to learn who sleeps around and who does not get any... we put it into place so you know who has an honest ad and who has integrity in keeping their word and showing up. But in fact by giving and receiving feedback you help other members determine who's
-ad is accurate
-photos are current
-not a flake and show's up
-active on the site
-a safe bet for a hook-up!

--- After all even if a guy has an accurate ad and shows up, no one leaves positive feedback for men with evil intentions!

So leave feedback when you meet someone---even if it's just for a coffee---it tells others he is real, he is honest, he is safe. And he will return the favor! And watch your email for a very special invitation later this month. It will admit you to a new concept in online hook-ups...something we know you have not experienced before. Steven AlexanderSite Directorm4m-World.com"

So, in other words, use M4M-World and you won't get hurt. How's that for scare tactics?

Can you think of other ways to ensure that the folks you meet online are legit?

Black books...let's count!

I used to try and keep a running tally of everyone I've ever made out with. A good friend of mine had been trying all her kissing life to kiss someone with a first name starting with each letter of the alphabet. For her this meant once grabbing a cab driver in New York named Xavier and giving him some tongue to snag that hard to reach X. Regardless, I lost count of my own alphbetical kisses. So, my little black book could have helped me. So its for listing when you do-it, but hey, it would have helped me count how many letters I have left.

Another little black book program can be downloaded at Californiamen.net, a non-cruisy place for gay and queer guys who hookup online. This little black book takes it one step further and includes a basic risk assessment. If you record an encounter that oversteps your self-defined risk level, you are sent a kind reminder to get and STD or HIV check.

What's helpful about both of these is that you can list all sorts of info about your conquests, including their phone number, email etc. If you're a happy hussy that could come in handy if you ever get an STD and need to do the courteous thing...tell them.

Come on, eavesdrop

When you hook up with someone for the first time, how do you decide how safe to be? How does being super high affect your ability to protect yourself? How do you wade through the guys who all want to party if you would rather be stoned than rubbing yourself raw all night? ISIS, Inc. and the SFDPH have partnered to ask a few gay/queer/bi men these questions, record them, and spit it back at you.

To our surprise the podcasts have already reached number 14 on itunes in the sexuality section, so we're happy. Not all of the story tellers are posted yet, so there's something to look forward to if this is your thing.

So, how did your date go Area Man?